My heart broke for her.......

Last week i met with a friend who has expressed she is no longer in love with her husband. She cried in my arms. I tried so hard not to cry too but my heart is weak and I cried.
She expressed to me that she has tried over and over to help him notice her., she'es tried so hard to reach out to him and figure out what is wrong because she can see it in her face, she can feel it in his heart.


I didn't have anything to say...I just stayed a good support. It was clear that she was going to leave him.  To me it was clear that she was putting her and her kiddos first and she needed to make sure that they were all taken care of no matter what.

I reminded her that we all change over the years and change is ok.  what the hardest thing is is to admit that and move on. Harder then you'll ever think......

we always want to protect our kids and but they hurt more when we're hurting .....the kiddos know, even when we think they don't, it's just hard to realize and admit.

Happiness is so hard to come by...marriage is a battle, you must love unconditionally to commit and go through everything you need to as a team.No blame or shame.............but at the same time even after yrs of marriage people change and drift apart and I think that is the hardest to admit when in a relationship.

I've had others rhetorically state "but we've been together for 20 yrs and I don't love him anymore and he's so awesome" how does that happen?

People change.....

I don't think I did anything more for my friend but give her a shoulder to cry on and to cry with.  these types of situations rattle my heart because of my past battles and it kills me to know my friends struggle and experience the pain i have. It's brutal.......Love is brutal........heart break is  just explainable

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I just am not sure....

Our lives move so fast, so many things change. there is so much I missed with raising my son Max I refuse to miss those moments with my daughter. But I feel like life is moving so fast I can't get  a hold of anything.
She likes a boy, I don't want her to like a boy.  I remember when I liked a boy and even though he is awesome today, we don't know what that boy will be like in 30 yrs. She changed her hair color, I am sure that is a phase.
 I see deep down inside she misses her horse...he was injured early this year and we've been just bidding time....but I see so much life in Kaitlynn when she's riding and competing. I miss her being able to miss her horse...
isn't this what parenting is all about. changes....feelings....personality changes, life changes.  For our kiddos..it seems non stop.

My kaitlynn needs her Temesun back.

when you find your place...

what does it mean when you find your place

To me you just feel you should of been there already years ago.  I have struggled in the last 2 years professionally, I am a very loyal individual a give 100% to my employer...my career is so important to me...........sometimes i feel i neglect my family

however..........i think i found my place

so what that means is that i transitioned smoothly, not much resistance.  My boss is amazing, so awesome It's like a fairy tale.

i know it's not always going to be perfect, this week was sink or swim...but I was on a Fricken floatie!!!

I didn't sink and i didn't have to swim.....i floated!! Why????????? because of the team i have because of the boss I have. I may walk out of there EXHAUSTED but I am exhausted and have something to show for it and damn proud of it.

I have alot to learn ..OMG sooooooooo much to learn but damn I thank GOD today for where I'm at and the blessings I've been gifted.